This may be the soundtrack to my senior year. Yes, I know I’ll have a good time among the stress/work/drama/bullshit, but it isn’t going to be “the best years of my life,” or at least I hope not. I want so much more. This school is only a part of my life, and I need to know I’ll be somewhere better than where I am.
It is 4:00 AM. Why am I still awake? Insomnia, I know it’s been awhile since we’ve last met, and I’m not saying I don’t miss you, but why tonight? I have to be places around 10:30 tomorrow. I’ve got a last summer luau to get ready and decorate for.
You know Insomnia, the thing I don’t like about you is that we never do anything fun. I’m always here really bored out of my mind and you sit there and mock me. Why is it that when you come around I have no idea what I should do to take up my time.
Oh Insomnia, you always know the perfect time to pay me a visit. It’s charming really, but time’s are rough, our time should be through. Savor your last few minutes with me, hopefully we don’t meet again for a little while, so we’ll have something to actually do/catch up on when you do come around.
Good Night. Maybe. <3
PS. this entire post was me being out of my mind and a complaint, so switch the bracelet it is. I’ll have this no complaint thing down in .. 3 years at the earliest, but hey it doesn’t matter how long, as long as I get there, right?!
So I’ve just learned of an organization called A Complaint Free World (Check out the FAQ). The object of this organization is to better oneself by making it a habit to not complain. Complaining spreads negative energy and thus negative results. Without complaining as excessively as the average person does (15-30 times a day) you’re making yourself a happier more positive person, which I believe is lovely.
I’ve come to a point in my life where I believe in becoming a better person. I’m trying to not let silly things and people bother me, and at the end of the day I want to simply be a genuine person, who does what she does because it’s what she believes, and I believe this no complaint campaign is a great idea.
The purple bracelets that they offer are used as a tool to help you cut your complaining. At the moment I am using a peace sign bracelet I got at a flea market, although I would like to make a new bracelet that is strictly for this No Complaining project (I would like to get the official bracelet except they’re only sold in packs of 10 and I’m not too fond of the silicon/latex bracelet thing anymore, that was so 2004-2005. LiveStrong started it all, baby! Also, the peace sign bracelet always needs to be adjusted to be switched from arm to arm, [*oh lookie here, a complaint, gotta switch arms now.*] so a new bracelet would just be easier.).
The goal is that for 21 days you go without complaining. Studies show that it takes about three weeks for a new habit to form, so if one can go without complaining for 21 days then it’ll become a habit and the person will as a result be a happier person.
Obviously this isn’t an easy task as I’m so used to complaining, hell I love to complain, but having to do something (switch the bracelet) after I complain will make me more aware of my complaining which will definitely help me to stop. I don’t believe I’ll have those 21 days down for a long while, and that’s okay. I’m not doing this to prove anything to anyone, I just want to do it for myself, no matter how long it takes. I want to know that I can refrain from complaining for 3 weeks. I’d like to be a happier more positive person, who doesn’t?
I’m learning to realize that shit happens, and you have to deal with it. Thinking about what you could have done differently, the “if only I did ______ before _____ then _____ would never have happened” doesn’t do you any good. You have to accept your situation in order to move forward. You have to take responsibility and accept all the repercussions.
It scares me half to death, but I’m realizing it’s what I need to do. I think this is called being an adult; which REALLY scares me.
I haven’t posted songs in so long, which isn’t cool at all. Music is my only constant, and I believe I should be sharing my tastes and preferences to the world to hear. I just want people to know what’s out there. You don’t have to like anything I post, you don’t even have to listen, but I’d like it if you did.
Tonight I leave you all with “Monotov’s Private Opera” by Third Eye Blind. I had the pleasure of seeing this talented and influential band a little over a month ago at the Bamboozle Roadshow. This song is one of my favorites, and I was very excited it was on their set list.
I was looking at my old LiveJournal and reading the blogs. It gives me a weird feeling. There is a difference between now and then, but I don’t know if it’s better or worse. It’s just different. I feel like the photos I reblog and the occasional rant blog show me in a sense that wasn’t shown via LJ. However, on LJ I exposed myself in a way a little more different than tumblr. It was more “raw.” There was no one to listen, no lazy half ass cop out through pictures. There were only my feelings and the words I used to express them.
Maybe I need to bring it back a little. I haven’t really written in the longest time, which is really sad. Writing has always been a large part of my life. Most things I write don’t make it to the eyes of others, and if they do, it’s only in pieces. Nothing fits. I can’t even figure out where it all belongs.
good night tonight.
The perfect combination; now and then. What’s right x2, in one. together, finally. This is who I want to be, this is who I am. This is what’s right.