something like this would normally be on my personal blog, but i am drunk and don't care right now.
I think I am a remotely good friend. I always go the extra mile to make sure my closest friends are doing okay. I sincerely care about their well being. I am the one to make the calls and take the initiative.
I just don’t think that it’s fair when I seem to be the only person putting effort into my friendships. It’s funny how things change so suddenly. Relationships that were so strong suddenly become weak. They nearly fall apart, but for what reason? nothing. I get tired of having things to say to people, wanting to tell my friends the stupidness of how I feel, the things I have done, the way I have acted when I get nothing in return. I don’t like needing or wanting people around who don’t seem to want my company. It really just gets annoying when I feel like I put my life on the line for people I love and adore and get nothing in return.
Call me egotistic, but sometimes I don’t think some people deserve my friendship for the lack of effort and meaning they give in return.
If I really meant that much to anyone, it would be obvious; it would be shown. There would be a reciprocity of calls/texts/communication.
All in all, I am just getting annoyed sometimes and it hurts.